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Contents this page were published in the September/October, 1997 edition of the Washington Free Press.
WFP, 1463 E. Republican #178, Seattle, WA -USA, 98112. -- WAfreepress@gmail.com
Copyright © 1997 WFP Collective, Inc.
The Best of American Newspeak
Recycling Gains New Supporters
Industries around the country have been turning to recycling ever since they discovered their hazardous wastes face virtually no federal regulations as soon as they are labeled as fertilizer products. Loopholes in the law have allowed toxic and even radioactive materials to be spread on our nation's farm fields without the bothersome task of actually listing them as ingredients. Recent exposes by the Seattle Times have led to calls for more federal regulation. Fortunately, Alcoa Aluminum has a better idea. They are in the middle of recycling a 120,000 ton mountain of state-listed dangerous wastes like arsenic lead into nutritious fertilizer. Do they need more government? No, says project manager Ozzie Wilkinson, "It's a much more efficient system to have self-policing than to have government go out and do it." Hasn't it always been more cost-effective to have the foxes guarding the hen houses? (ST 7/13)
Special Achievements in Youth Outreach
Advertising Age recently saluted the "Marketing 100", the key ad executives whose ideas have helped build strong brands. Prominent amongst this select group was Victor Lindsley, who has navigated Newport Cigarette's "Alive With Pleasure" ad campaign for the Compton Partners. Newport has slowly risen to become our second most purchased cigarette thanks to its commitment to maintaining high ad spending while other tobacco producers have had "waffling ad budgets." But in our quote of the month, Ad Age goes on, citing industry analyst Roy Barry, to praise the fact that "Newport has a younger smoker profile than Kool, an elusive but important growth factor in tobacco marketing." Just how young that smoker profile was they didn't say. But it would seem logical, the younger the profile, the more Ad Age would be singing praises... A further note, Seagram's Whiskey also won accolades for the "boldness" of its "groundbreaking" return to TV advertising. (AA 6/30)
Doctors Find Their True Calling
This past year many Doctors have seen their earnings plummet. They've watched HMO's turn them into mere "health care providers" whose services are to be sold at the lowest price possible. Doctors like Glenn Meyers of Florida, who has watched his income drop from $400,000 to a mere $300,000, say HMO's are "imperiling the lifestyle they expected." But fortunately, Dr. Meyers, like many others in the medical community, has found an answer. He turned to Amway! Now when he meets a patient stressed out from financial concerns, he can take them aside and offer a real cure selling everything from soap powders to appliances. Although doctors must be careful not to sell Amway products while practicing medicine (it would be bad taste during an operation), they can drop hints even to colleagues about the need to build a "hedge against managed care," and then suggest a private discussion later. More doctors are heeding the Amway call despite the unfortunate fact, reported by Dr. Don Berkowitz, that "a lot of doctors are scared that it reduces their status." But sometimes you just have to be a nonconformist. (WSJ 6/18)
Going Beyond Mere Privacy
Ever wonder where all that information you give on questionnaires goes? It turns out much of it has been going to the Texas prison system, where inmates have been entering data on our personal lives for Metromail Corporation, a seller of direct marketing information. This fact was exposed after an Ohio woman named Beverly Denis started receiving e-mail from a stranger who knew all about her from entering data into her consumer file at Metromail. That 25 page file even contained information on how often she used room deodorizers, sleeping aids and hemorrhoid remedies. Thanks to scanners and bar codes, marketing companies can now track our purchasing history for individual products with precision. Naturally this has brought criticism. But defenders of surveillance like Chet Dalzell of the Direct Marketing Association, point out "It's beneficial to the whole economy, it's beneficial to consumers. It's just the marketplace trying to be intelligent." It would appear to have a very high I.Q. Robert Posch, Jr., a VP for Doubleday, puts down the issue as "the ultimate touchy-feely issue." Privacy, he says, is just "some notion of the right to be left alone. Spare me." Let's all try to grow up and get with the 90's. (NYT 6/12)
Latin America Gets Modernized
The U.S. policy of not selling advanced weapons to Latin America was finally ended by the Clinton Administration. The U. S. has been loathe to set off local arms races between prestige seeking dictators, but the current menu of stable democracies has brought changes in our thinking. In the words of Assistant Secretary of State Thomas McNamera, the U. S. had to allow Latin American countries to modernize their militaries "as any modern democracy would." Imagine a democracy without the latest Stealth bomber? But the prize for best use of the English language in defense of enlarging the military porkbarrel for Lockheed goes to White House spokesperson Michael McMurry. Just listen to his scintillating prose: "It is in America's national security interest to promote stability and security among our neighbors in the hemisphere by engaging them as equal partners as they modernize and restructure their defense establishment." So let's order another round of F-16 fighter planes for our new found "equal partners". (NYT 8/2)
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